In my journey to discover the definition of success, I’m beginning to realize it’s not about where we are per se but more about who we are. The following matches come to mind when I’m defining who “me” is:
Who vs. where
Do vs. be
Me vs. me
Who vs. where
We often search for where we should be. I’ve discovered it is not a search of where but a creation of my definition- “Who am I?” rather than “Where should I be?” Initially, I believed location was a defining factor in happiness or success, but I am now seeing our location as an influencer rather than a determining factor. Getting where we want is essentially defining who we are and finding an environment that allows us to be ourselves.
Do vs. be
In a recent meeting with a mentor, I was asked, “What is more important, doing or being?” The answer was, of course, doing- life is about action. But as we delved deeper into the meaning of do and be, being became more critical in my mind. Being lets us do organically. Being is allowing ourselves to live a seamless life from our professional time to personal time. It takes out the common disjoint of work me and home me being different. Being is identifying who we are and why we are which then allows us to do in a natural, comfortable way.
Me vs. me
This argument comes to mind when I am deciding who I genuinely am vs. who I think I “should be.” We all have ideas about what society would like us to be, but opinions aside, who are we truly? Deciding who we authentically are is the first step in defining happiness and success. Deciphering what makes us “us” will help with clarity in the work we can do without changing who we are. It will also give us some idea of what happiness and success look like in our lives. Doing things that support the “me” influenced by others’ opinions could send us down a road barren of self-fulfillment.
Identifying who we are will let us know what we need in our lives to bring fulfillment.
“The aim of life is self-development, to realize one’s nature perfectly.” – Oscar Wilde
Kasey Cleaver 
You are wise beyond your years. You are learning now what so many of us learn late in life. Our success is measured in the lives we’ve influenced as well as in the lives that influence us. ❤️
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